My Body Needs Detailed

My husband once had my sports car detailed. It gleamed, it shone, it sparkled. The detailing results were magnificent.

Now I need MY body detailed. It’s sagging, drooping, and dull.

I think I’ll start at the top and work down.

First, hair coloring – cut; maybe highlights.k Price: 40 cups of coffee

Then facial hair removed. Next a real facial. Then body waxing in private parts – Ugh – that will hurt. Then leg waxing. Total: 50 cups of coffee

After that, a full body massage; maybe a hot stone treatment. Then a mani-pedi. Better tuck a book into my bag. Next, Botox to get rid of the turkey neck. Total cost: 120 cups of coffee

At last. I can cut the tags off of my new blouse and get ready to sashay out to dazzle the world!!! But I may cut back on the number of cups of coffee for a while. It’s so expensive to be female.